Sunday, June 30, 2013

The Atonement and the Pain of Infertility and Pregnancy Loss

On Saturday Taylor and I had the opportunity to go to Thanksgiving Point Gardens with my brother Aaron and my best friend Sara. We have been hearing about a new garden that they have there and have been wanting to see it ever since. The garden is called The Light of the World garden. Its a bunch of statues and they are amazing pieces of art. Right now there are two very large statues but the plan is to make all the small ones into a lot larger versions and expand the garden. The garden is a little bit hidden and when we went, there was nobody else around. It was so peaceful and calming and turned out to be quite a spiritual experience for me. Here are some of the statues:

All of the statues were amazing but there is one that stood out a lot more for me. We came to this one:

The details on this piece were remarkable. I then walked under the statue and looked at the face. The picture doesn't do it justice. The face was depicted so well. The pain and sadness in the face brought so many emotions. As I stood there and looked at the face I was thinking about how Christ suffered for each one of us. He suffered for all of our sins, trials, and pains. I then thought about my recent miscarriage and how He knew what it would feel like to go through something so hard and He knew how hard it would be for someone to go through infertility and related trials. At times through this journey I have definitely had my struggles and wondered why I was going through this and wondered if He was there. He definitely is though and he paid the ultimate price. He is one that knows exactly what I am going through and knows exactly what I am feeling. He wouldn't want any of His children to go through these hard things, but its part of the plan. Through the Atonement, all of the pain, frustration, discouragement, and tears will be multiplied in happiness, joy, love, and tears of joy. It will be this way for me as well as all others who need to go through infertility, pregnancy loss, and related trials.

I am so happy we had the chance to visit that garden. It helped me so much with the feelings I was having through the past little while, and helped me to grow closer to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

Why "Making It To Someday"?

It was a little bit of a thought process to come up with the perfect blog name. I wanted something that really told our story and had meaning for us. I knew the blog needed the word “someday” in it because it has so much meaning. “Someday” is on the heart charm that Taylor gave me for our anniversary, and it’s the title of the children’s book that we really like. We used both in our photo shoot as well. It’s a reminder that someday we will get the baby that we are wanting so much, working towards, and preparing for.

In many blessings we have been promised that we will have children. We just don’t know when or how they will come to us. Someday is a good reminder that it will be happening. It’s not just a possibility. Heavenly Father has made us a promise and he doesn’t go back on His promises.

Getting to that day when we will hold our baby in our arms is also a journey, and it’s not an easy one. It takes a lot of strength, endurance, and patience. We know it will happen but we just need to make it to that point the best that we can. After thinking about this concept I then came up with “Making it to Someday”.

Our hope with this blog is to document our story, write about topics that we have learned about through our journey, and maybe give some hope to others out there. We definitely don’t know everything, but we have learned a lot along the way. This will also give us a place to look back and see how far we have come on this journey when we get discouraged or frustrated, and it will hopefully give us more strength to keep moving forward to our end goal. 

Friday, June 28, 2013

2 year & Infertility Photo Shoot

In May we got the idea to do a two year photo shoot since we hadn't had pictures taken since our wedding. Not only did we want to do a regular photo shoot but we wanted to do an infertility photo shoot or one that helped to tell our story. On our second anniversary Taylor gave me a bracelet with a heart charm on it that had the word "someday" engraved on it. He gave it to me as a reminder that someday we will get our children that we long for so much. We never thought we would get to our second anniversary without a child. We also found a children's book titled "Someday" that has a great meaning to it and relates to our story. We used the same photographer that did our wedding and engagement pictures, Amy Rau. She did such an amazing job and we are so happy with all of the pictures. They help to tell our story perfectly! They are a great reminder to us and they were a great way to document this time in our lives.